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Monday, February 28, 2011

how i wish i could turn back time.

apa suda gia tu sia mau sakap.. erm..

*kurik2 kalimumur a.k.a hairdandruff*

alaaaa.. sia lupa suda.
urg yg busy mmg kuat lupa bha. [macam tai]

i want to talk in Malay right now, but anyway, this video is such a sweetie.

Al : Peo~ Ajar sia buat kerja rumah.. Macam sa tida pandai
Me : Bha mari la cinta ku Al.. Minta ajar Abang Peo yg ensem :)
Al : c Peo tinggal saaana d rumah Aunty Ros suda kan..
Me : O_O

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

my thoughts for tonight.

as im sitting here, thinking of the thoughts that i've thought before.
one wrong step might cause the oils to spill in the ocean and kill the wonderful fishes.

all i want is to sit on a wooden bench, beside a wonderful lake.
all i want is freedom to do things and to make things right.

as im sitting here, i knew that dreaming is completely useless.
i can never do things like that.
because what happened, is already happened.

darling, how can you make a dead fish to swim?
how can you blossom a dead flower?
how can you make a dead ant to walk again?

darling, i've always said to people that, "If you're the one who started it, then you're the one who will end it."
but look at me now.
im not able to do that.

look how pathetic i am right now.
hah. my brain is laughing at me while im having a conversation with my mind.

trying not to be selfish, trying to please everybody,
trying to give an even pleasure to everyone,
yet, in the end, i still cannot please everybody.

i learned a lesson.
between two rivals, ONE is meant to be HURT.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Saturday, February 26, 2011
reblog about last night :D

im going to reblog about last night.
[pardon me for the low quality camera. i used HandyCam since i didnt found my DigCam.]

so as Anne knocked the door and opened it,
i saw lots of people waiting for me with a cake infront.
after that, Anne put up a small beautiful crown on my head.

then there comes a touching moment.
where my tears betray me and i couldnt say anything.
i hugged every one of my bestfriends.

again, im going to say thank you for spending your time & money and putting you in such troubles for someone stupid like me.

back to the story,
after i finished with my "moments", haha, Anis played a slide show.
i already told you the entitle of that slide show.
Anis put up a photo of me and Jambul[Juvenill], and my face is FREAKINGLY ugly.
[dont worry, i wont get mad at you :P]

and then the last part of that slide show, there were me playing guitar last year.
arghttt! XD buruk~ haha~

as i sat down, i saw ROSES and purple candles! PURPLE!
they said they knew that i LOVE purple, so they picked the purple ones.
isnt that so sweet?
believe me, i thought they wouldnt care about my fav colour at all.

and the roses. they're the REAL one.
remember the thing that i told you before?
about i cannot smell the wonderful smell of roses that lots of girl are talking about?
last night, finally i do. :D

while i was eating, i saw a big headline entitled, "WE LOVE FEO".
i was freaking happy untill i couldnt finish my food.

after we finished eating, we all YAMMSINGG together.
then we closed all of the lamps, put the volumes up, and danced infront.
the only thing that light us up were the candles, and Anis's laptop's screen's light. lol.

too bad there's an empty table :(
too bad that i didnt bring my cam with me.
too bad there's no Vian and no Dora.

but afterall! it's still so damn freaking fun!

anyway, at first they pulled me in to dance,
but i cannot dance. hahaha.
i only know how to dance my "Tarian Sotong".

i saw the girls were dancing like they were in a club.
trust me, i love the way they dance.
especially Lanie's dance. i was like, "WOW! hot chick!".

i can only watch from afar, sit and eat the cakes.
[which makes my tummy so bloated that night]

the boys were supporting too!
they did a Shuffle dance and a random dance.
usually, boys were shy to dance randomly infront of the girls,
but last night, it was a big NO.
i clapped for their bravery. haha~

i dont expect that i'll get presents.
actually i dont need them, like i've told you before.
i only need a SINCERE heart :D

the birthday surprise that you all gave me is already a BIG present.
another day to be remembered.

okay i really dont expect that they'll give me a birthday surprise.
they were good in acting!
another claps for being able to lie to me. xD

another thing, i love my bestfriends,
and my close friends too, who came to the party last night.

gifts are meant to be unwrapped.
if it's not unwrapped, then it's not a gift.

the most SPECIAL present is from Anne, which is the birthday surprise! :D
and the dress that she gave me!

the most SWEET present is from Anis! hahaha.

as soon as i opened the box, the first thing that i realised is the PIG CLIP!

i dont want to buy it at first because Anis said she liked it too!
i dont want to snatch my bestfriend's favourite.

[HAHA. Mao Mao + Pig = Me]

[Yayyy~ Manishah~]

[based from the shape, i knew that it's a chocolate! XD]

and the most SINCERE present is from Billy! :D
as i unwrapped it, i saw this,

i thought he was going to give me a green tea!
so i laughed my ass off because they said Green Tea can make someone become thin.
i thought he was being sarcastic.

but, NO! it's not the Green Tea!
it's this! :

awwww Billy! thank you! you're the first one and the only one who give me a Coke for a present. :D
&& you know how much i LOVE Cokes! XD

and chocolate!

the most SIMPLE but meaningful gift is from Goput!

looked like a plain gift, huh?
you're wrong.

yayyy~ i love chocolates.

the most FUNNY gift is from Syafiqa!

HAHAHA. XD. i'll put that up on my bathroom.
just kidding~ i'll put them on my bedroom :)

[i LOVE you all! :D]

Ira & Someone[i forgot who. im so sorry :( ] gave me angpao.
lazy to buy me present, eh? :P

[i know where you buy this! hahaa >:) ]

[ :( empty card?]

this time, it's WAY MORE FUN and ENJOY than our Prom Night last year!
our Prom Night SUCKS.

so, ladies and gentlemen, please do appreciate every wonderful thing that you have right now.
because if you did ONE wrong step, you might lose them forever.

i know, that's unfair because you need second chance.
but this is the LIFE.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Friday, February 25, 2011

okay, here goes the first story.
last Wednesday, my bestfriend, Anne, told me to go to Hotel Perkasa and attend her cousin's engagement.
i said, "Okay"

and then, i felt like i was being isolated from my group.
like they were talking about something and hiding secrets from me.
when i saw they were in a conversation, i joined them in and they were all silent.
however, i just kept it inside my heart.

so today, which is Friday, i went to Hotel Perkasa with Anne.
she picked me up.

as we were on the way to the room, it was all silent.
it was weird.
after that, she knocked and opened the door,

i was shocked.
and untill now, im very very touched.
at the same time, i was super duper happy.
they gave me a birthday surprise.
MY TEARS BETRAYED ME! how come they fell without my permission?!
gosh. it was so touching.

and then Anis played the SlideShow entitled "Happy Birthday Feodora Grace Japanis".
and they played my fav song, Katy Perry - Peacock!

gosh. if only you guys knew how much i love you all.
lesbian alert. lol just kidding.

i cannot describe this happiness in words.

Anne : Sa tau ko x pnah celebrate birthday, jd sa buat sbb kami mau tingu ko menangis dan terharu. Sbb slalu ko sja yg kasi mnangis kami. Sa gembira oo plan sa brjaya~ hahah

XD HAHA! this is the first time i cry for this year.
imagine if lots of people actually really appreciate you for living in this cruel world.

there are lots of thing to say!
i'll just blog the rest of them and upload the pictures tomorrow.
because im too sleepy right now.


i really appreciate it!

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

silly things i did when i was feeling bored.

i did crazy things alone.
=,= lameass.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

my heart is controlling me, once again.


my heart is controlling me , once again.

my new quote :
"Dont let you heart control you. Let YOU, yourself, control your heart."

that quote really contain LOTS of meaning.
some of the meanings, i left hidden inside my heart.
i dont want to tell you! haha.

one of the meaning is, when you got this instinct about something bad is going on,
but you're not sure whether it's really true or just your instinct.
so if your heart control you completely, you'll do something stupid.
but if you control your heart, not lying to your heart, but controlling it, you'll be free from doing something stupid.

right now, i ......... okay it's hard to say.
hey, if my instinct is right, im going to scream my lungs out and let my tears betray me.

i am so going to control my heart.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

a wonderful morning song.

it's 6.33AM :)

and this song really makes me bright! :D

make sure you listen to it !

out of our minds and out of times~ wishing i could be with you and share the view! ooooh we could've falling in love!

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Wednesday, February 23, 2011
the reason why i cannot blog often.

i cannot update my blog often because something big came out.
i need to move out from my house temporarily.
maybe for only about one or two months, or even three months.
why? erm.. if you're my close friends, you'll know why :)

so i moved to this place called Taman Cerijaya.
i dislike living in this place.

there's no WiFi, no TV, and i need to use this broadband.
i cannot do much noise, i cannot scream, i cannot karaoke, i cannot sing loudly.
most of all, i feel lonely here because it's so damn silent.

enough talking about the bad things,
the good thing about living in here is,
i am FREE to walk around the town, because this housing is nearby with the Keningau town!
muahahahaha! >:)

anyway, as i was feeling bored in this house, i did several stupid things with my webcam.
i record videos, capture pictures.

and hell yeah,
now i realised that there are lots of video that i want to upload.

later la yarh i upload video.
for now, im just going to upload pictures :)

[high-waist short pant :)]

[Lowong : Left Side]

[my nametag]

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Monday, February 21, 2011
im walking away.

im done trying.
if you want me in your life, you're gonna have to find a way to put me there.
if you dont, that's me walking away.

and yes, whenever i want to express something,
Tumblr is the way out.Link

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Sunday, February 20, 2011
an ordinary full moon.

bought things with Anne yesterday.
after that, she went home, and i decided to continue browsing alone.

i saw lots of cute dress, but i was lazy to browse for it.
because there were lots of girl browsing at the same place.
when girls meet girls, they'll have this one "connection" to find each other's ugliness.
since i was alone, then i went to another place. lol.

i bought high-waisted short pants.
i wonder if i use it, stupid-people-who-dunno-what-fashion-is would laugh at me.
[will take a picture of it later]

did you saw the beautiful full moon last night?
i wonder why i never get bored staring at the ordinary full moon.
even though they're just the same everytime i look at it.
a round, circle and a plain white planet.
nothing special.

actually, the Moon isnt that special.
it's only that the Sun makes it special.
the Sun gives the Moon its light, making the Moon shining bright.

it's the same with humans.
we're all the same. just plain and ordinary.
but if we have that SHINE, we can be beautiful.

except for LIZARDS.
lizards are ugly, no matter how hard they try to be beautiful.
accept it :)

p/s : i washed my shoes just now and i never thought that the CLOROX can be so helpful.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Saturday, February 19, 2011

long time ago, i've created this one production of mine called "Happy Aliens".
and untill now, im still using it and i LOVED it so freaking much.

[this is my Facebook, and i put (HappyAliens) on it.]

so this morning, i was checking things out on Facebook, untill i saw another stupid copycater.

look at her name. she put (Happy Aliens) too! and she was online!
you can see the picture above that i posted on her wall.

even though she's on the line, she didnt reply my post.
memang begitu la style copycat kan? takut mau mengaku.

Saya Tidak Puas Hati.
so i chatted her.



you think im that dumb enough to believe your lies?

back off, biatch.
i dont give a damn.

you better change it before tomorrow.
if you havent changed it tomorrow, i'll make you feel ASHAMED.
make you freakingly ashamed.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Friday, February 18, 2011
no matter how hard you try, a past is just a memory.

im quite sleepy and tired right now,
but anyway, i went to the library just now with my bestfriends.
i cancelled my plan to go to the town because i dont have enough time.

no worries, we planned to go tomorrow.

so during our time on the library, me and Anis searched for books.
i realised that i've read almost all of those interesting books.
no, im not showing off.
as i searched for a book to read, i found nothing. already read them.

but finally! new books arrived and i found this :

it's very interesting, indeed.
too bad that we cannot borrow books because the server was offline.

and i found my old favourite book :

i gained lots of inspiration from this book.
this book is crazy, i tell you la.

as i introduced those interesting books to Anis,
i just realised that Anis was holding a pile of books.
haha pardon me :D i was carried off a bit.

[candid~ Anis with the pile of books.]

[yayy! finally she let me take a picture of her face half-face.]

[that's a silly book, too. but it's a fun read. :)]

[Shima~ busy texting with Mr.Who. haha okay actually she was looking at her pictures]

[Anne~ busy with Facebook & songs]


Anne's lappy reminds me of my old lappy.
i miss it :'(

my old Yahoo!Conferences were still saved in it.

but no matter how hard you try, a past is just a memory.
a memory wont be coming back.
why? because it's only a memory left, silly.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Thursday, February 17, 2011
im vulnerable.

i feel too sleepy right now.
but im still going to blog anyway.

nowadays, im easily fatigued.
even if i sleep early at 8PM, i'll still be tired on the next morning.
plus, my backbone hurts!

is it because of i used my brain and my body too much?

just now, my mom asked me, "What did u do at school untill u're this tired?"
dont bother to ask me. because i wonder why , too.

so in the end, i decided to take things lightly.
i cancelled my tuition, i cancelled doing lots of homework in one day.
instead, i'll do each of them one by one.

another headache came.
there are TWO folios that i'll need to finish before May.
one folio for Geography, and one folio for History.
they're very important for PMR.

let's hope that my migraine wont come back again.
it's damn torturing, man.

im going to buy sport shoes & etc etc things tomorrow :D
i want to buy them so that my brain could function properly and wont get fatigue too early.

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Purple Eyeliner + Black Eyeshadow

i forgot to tell you that yesterday, i bought a purple eyeliner.
Anis already blogged about it :)

so today, i did an experiment on my eyes.
Purple Eyeliner + Black Eyeshadow.

here you go :

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-

Monday, February 14, 2011
my superb Valentine Day.

i've got lots of story to blog about! haha~
yesterday, 14th February which is Valentine Day, i hanged out with my bestfriends!
:D of course, it was so freaking fun.

at first, i went to Anis's mother's office to meet up with Anis.
after that, we went to this shop where we found lots of cute hairclips.

each hairclips has a pair.
so i decided to buy one pair and give one for Anis.
[since we cannot make the "Bestfriend Tattoos"]

[hairclip that both of us have]

and Anis did the same too.
she bought a purple and a blue hairclip and she gave me the purple one.

*searching for that purple hairclips & in panic*

okay erm.. Anis, if you're reading this, IM SO SORRY!
im sure that i put it inside my bag, and im 101% positive that my lil bro checked my bag last night and i dont know where he put that hairclip.
arght! just wait after my lil bro get back home >:)

anyway, back to the topic, after we bought those hairclips,
we went to look around those shops.


[another big burger! NYUMM!]

and then i laughed when i saw this :

[HAHAHA. what a slut.]

unexpectedly, we met Shima.
so she joined us and we went to this one cafe called "Little Ice" to wait for Anne's arrival.

this cafe has a dinner set for Valentine's Day on 14th February only.
and then each of the couples will be given a rose.
me and Anis planned to book a dinner set for both of us,
but we cancelled the plan since the dinner set is only up on night. :(

[Shima was calling Anne.]

[Anis refused to capture a picture of her face. haha.]

Anne has finally arrived. Yay!
*clap clap clap*

after that, Anne gave me a cute little present.


i really appreciate gifts that people gave me with a sincere heart.
i dont appreciate gifts that people gave me with their heart saying, "I should gave her a gift because it's Valentine Day. It's not because I want to gave her a gift. It's because of the Valentine Day."

you know what? that's just the same with giving your SHIT to people.
and NOBODY would like to have a SHIT as a present.
except for DUMBASS.

okay, back to the real topic.

[the beautiful Anne :) ]

[see? Anis still dont want me to capture a photo of her face.]

[Red Beans + Ice Cream = Regret]

i regret that i didnt bring my cam.
terpaksa la guna camera handphone ku yg tidak berkualiti ini :(
*sob sob*

when we made the payment on the counter, we found this cute little thingy :D

[awww~ so small and so cute]

as soon after that, we went to the Karaoke Box [K-Box].
four of us sang NINE songs.
i felt my throat was boiling.

after that, we took a taxi and went to Taman Mahathir.
we were kissing at there! nah im just kidding. HAHA!
we played swings at there.

[Anis could stand the hot weather]

since it was too freaking hot, we decided to go inside the museum.

[Ground Floor]

i screamed out when Anis told me that the snake & the king crab is a REAL thing.
[kena awet]
i almost touched the snake! O_O

[the King Crab. *sakai*]

[the real freaking snake.]

[i thought this is a real stone too. but i was wrong. it was made up from polystyrene.]

[Anne captured this picture. i captured a picture of her too, but my camera caused the photo to have too much noise. so i decided to delete it. hehe.]

[even her tired face looks CUTE. *jealous*]

[look at that Anis. always refused to take a picture of her face. :P]

after that, we went to upstairs, the 1st Floor.
i saw this cute little thingy :

and i caught Anis playing with a thing.

the 1st Floor is a museum of insects & birds & old technology.

and then i saw this cute little person sneaked to play that HD computer.

[ANIS! CUTE! haha~ no im not being sarcastic, ok.]

and then there were two long cushions.
we sat at there, acting like it was our house. lol.
a BIG thanks to Anis for managing to switch on the air-cond.

finally we were exhausted, we called a taxi , we sent Shima home and we went to the town to help Anne bought some groceries for the night of Valentine Day.
Anne invited to go to her house that night.

Shima lied to me!
she told me to wear a dress because she'll be wearing one.
but it turned out to be that i was the ONLY one who was wearing a night gown!
i said "Shima kau tetap penipu" to Shima for the rest of the night.
haha. punishment.

so me and Shima waited for Anis's arrival on the street.

[the beautiful night scene with my bestfriends.]

[Shima the liar. haha.]

[the Anis has arrived!]

we planned to capture nice pictures.
but those boys suddenly came to us and our plan was ruined.
but, watever :D

the unforgettable night scene.

i dont know why.
but for the rest of the night, my brain told me that there's something that i should be sad about.
but untill know, i still cannot figure it out.
why should i be sad?

0 dropped words~

-ghost whisperer can't be heard-